Tom and Cathy Chase are raising a very large family—four boys, four girls, ages six to 17.
“I started out adopting two children [who were sisters] from a foster program,” Tom says. “And then I got together with Cathy. She had a son, and I adopted him. And then we had a son together.”
And so there were four. Until Cathy’s interest in working with developmentally delayed children—at first providing respite care, then taking classes—led to a memorable phone call.
“We were asked to take two girls temporarily,” Tom says. “Then we found out it was actually four brothers and sisters, and we didn’t want to split them up.”
Tom and Cathy created what he calls “a completely blended” family by following their hearts and responding to the children’s deepest feelings.
Keeping siblings together
When children are separated from parents and placed in out-of-home care, the desire to stay with their siblings is intense. Tom and Cathy Chase understand and honor that birth-family connection.
“I’ve found the best way to nurture a child was to find out what they love,” Cathy says, “and to love everything about them and everything that they love. Especially ones that you adopt or that come into your home in a foster situation.”
Building trust is a delicate process. And intensely rewarding.
“The thing that’s touched me especially is the four in guardianship,” Tom says. “The girls took to us real easy and became part of our family. The boys were a little bit tougher. Now because we have opened our hearts and opened our home to them, they’re calling us Mom and Dad. You know they’ve accepted us as their family.”
Life in the Chase household
Life’s never dull for Tom and Cathy and Amber and Courtney and Joe and Angelo and Angelina and Vinny and Thomas and Vanessa.
The children share two ethnic heritages and make up a rich gamut of personalities, interests, challenges, and skills.
There’s a dancer, an A student, and an athlete. A helper, a typical teen, and everyone’s favorite big sister. They range from shy to socially at ease to attention-getters. Some perform at grade level and others cope with developmental delays caused by the prenatal effects of alcohol and drugs.
All are lively young people who clearly enjoy family life—having brothers and sisters, being daughters and sons.
Tom and Cathy didn’t start out to have eight children. But they wouldn’t have it any other way now. “My kids are great,” Tom says. “I’m thankful I brought them into my life.”